A couple of years ago, I tried out online dating, and noticed that strange things get said like, “I enjoy discussing atheism and politics.” I mean, I’m interested in those topics too and like to stay informed, but I don’t like to have conversations that end in arguments on a first date. I mean, if we really hit it off, we’ll have all the time in the world to hate each other.

To be fair, I only tried free sites, because meeting the next person to ruin my life should be free. It’s also hard to commit to a relationship once you end a ten year marriage, because now, no matter who I’m with, I know there’s someone else out there who could make me just as miserable. Plus, I already have a kid and a vasectomy. So, there’s no genetic incentive in it for me.

Also, children are the ultimate long term relationship. You clothe, house, and feed them for twenty plus years, while they do absolutely nothing in return. And, as with his mother, if all my years of hard work and sacrifice result in my child fucking his boss and getting a sweet house and car out of the deal, I’ll consider it a success.

(listen at https://soundcloud.com/yourfaultforlistening/rowe)


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